Milton Berle Quotes

» I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-been, by far; for a might have-been has never been, but a has was once an are.

» If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.

» Laughter is an instant vacation.

» You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.

» A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours.

» The company accountant is shy and retiring. He's shy a quarter of a million dollars. That's why he's retiring.

» Poverty is not a disgrace, but it's terribly inconvenient.

» Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.

» I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting.

» If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

» I live to laugh, and I laugh to live.

» A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.

» I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank?

» We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight.

» Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.

Who Said It?

Who Said: "Whether it be the heart to conceive, the understanding to direct, or the hand to execute." Click To See

Daily Famous Quote

"Amnesty is the magnet. Other magnets that you mentioned are anchor babies who get benefits in this country and employer deductions for employees, even if they are here illegally, which Mr. King is addressing." - Virgil Goode

Milton Berle Quotes

Who Said It?

Daily Famous Quote

Quotes by Author

Quotes by Topic