» There's one thing about baldness, it's neat.
» There is more sophistication and less sense in New York than anywhere else on the globe.
» A humorist is a person who feels bad, but who feels good about it.
» There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have.
» It is a good thing that life is not as serious as it seems to a waiter.
» Don't ever slam a door, you might want to go back.
» Poverty must have many satisfactions, else there would not be so many poor people.
» Why resist temptation? There will always be more.
» Unhappiness is not knowing what we want, and killing ourselves to get it.
» Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.